Being an initiator of divorce can bring you plenty of benefits over your partner. You will gain control over the situation and direct the process in desirable mode. Yet, one cannot deny that there are also some disadvantages of filing for divorce first. It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be the source to make the first step to terminate the dead relationships.
Still, it is better to be aware and ready for some less pleasant consequences if you are the plaintiff. Check out more details on the topic and get ready to start the divorce process with confidence.
You Pay More
The biggest pitfall you will face when being the first one to intend to get divorced is the financial one. You will be the one to cove the filing fees. In addition, you will have to proceed with serving a spouse. If you decide to cooperate with a private process server or sheriff, you will be charged between half a hundred to several hundred additionally.
You Waste More Time
While your spouse will be walking around caring about their business, you will be seriously engaged with divorce preparations. Gathering papers, cooperating with specialists, planning after-divorce arrangements, locating and serving your spouse. It will all take a lot of your time, interrupting you from personal or work issues.
You Have to Do the Paperwork
If you hate the red tape, you will have unpleasant work to do. Filing for divorce will require you to collect the necessary papers. To save time, you can seek aid at online divorce in Illinois or hire an attorney to do the paperwork for you. While with online services, you will still collect personal and marriage data and fill out the papers; the process will be simpler with instructions and online help at hand. And the divorce attorney will do all the job for you but charge you respectively as well.
You Get More Responsibilities
Many people wonder what happens when you file for divorce first concerning the level of responsibility. The fair answer here is that you will be a little bit overwhelmed with responsibilities. It will be on you to file for divorce, serve your spouse, ask for temporary orders, be the first and the last to hold the word on trial.
Although it can be really stressful and bring you a lot of preparations to make, there will be many possibilities for you to control the divorce process and make it go your way.
Your Cards Are on the Table
If you and your spouse cannot decide who is the plaintiff in a divorce and you agree to take the initiative, get ready to be the first to reveal your intentions. When serving your spouse, you will have to complete the papers displaying your divorce visions as to custody, spousal support, property division, etc.
This will grant your partner a chance to come up with the best beneficial response and assess the chances of both of you in the divorce in general. At the same time, you will be in oblivion until you get the response from your soon-to-be-ex.
You Put the Hopes to the End
If both you and your partner realize that things are not working between you anymore, but your partner still has some hopes, you will be the heartbreaker at the end. If your spouse secretly wishes for family therapy or dreams of your marriage to be fixed somehow, the divorce announcement will make them disappointed and craving for the reunion. Things may end really unwell.
You Are to Deliver the Bad News
Announcing the divorce, you will be the one to deliver bad news. You will spoil the day and the mood. You may feel guilt and sorrow because of your part in it. Still, you have to realize that this is the only option to terminate your marriage and try to change your life for the better.
You Hold the Blame
If you are tired of arguing about who should file for divorce first, beware that making a first step towards the divorce will turn you into a ‘bad guy’ by default. You will be labeled by your spouse, kids, and relatives as the ones to initiate the family-destructive process. Yet, if you end your marriage for the better, people who care about you and your family will understand and support you eventually.
You Undergo More Stress
With all the responsibilities and preparations burdening you, you will undergo a decent amount of stress. The divorce preparation in the role of the plaintiff will take much of your time and energy. Still, you will get stressed anyway, whether you are a petitioner or defendant. So, your task is to care about your physical and mental wellness during the divorce as much as you can.
It May Be Dangerous for You
If you are in any kind of abusive relationship, one of the major disadvantages of filing for divorce first will be the danger you put yourself under. Your spouse may hurt you or your kids or get manipulative because you plan to leave. Yet, you will get even in a bigger danger if you keep on with your marriage. So you’d better ensure yourself and your children by preparing properly and get divorced anyway.
Divorce is an unpleasant process. But if you believe it is the best choice for you to change your life for the better, there is no point in waiting for some miracle. You need to gather all your confidence and powers and file for divorce first.
