Family fights are more frequent than sunrises. The average parent has nearly 2,200 arguments with their children every year.
Some fights resolve themselves with minimal fuss. Others last for days without a clear resolution. You must understand how to stop family fights before they get out of hand.
What should you do when a moment of conflict crops up? How can you resolve one in its tracks? How can you handle your intense emotions from getting worse? or you can consult premarital counselling adelaide.
Answer these questions and you can spend less time fighting and more time figuring out solutions. Here are eight strategies to end your family fights.
1. Think Through What You Are Going to Say
In the midst of family arguments, you may say something that escalates the situation. Before you say anything, take a deep breath and reflect on what you can say next. Try to avoid saying the first thing that comes into your mind.
2. Show That You Are Listening
When someone asks you a question, don’t give a yes or no answer. A child who asks, “Can I have another slice of pizza?” will not be satisfied if you just tell them no. “I understand you are still hungry, but I think you should have some vegetables instead” recognizes their desire for food and gives them a good alternative.
3. Be Precise With Your Feelings
“I’m upset” is imprecise and does little to resolve the situation. Describe what your emotion actually is, whether you are angry or anxious or sad.
Then detail the source of your emotion. “I am frustrated that we have been unable to figure out who does the dishes” is clear and direct.
4. Give Each Other Space
Some people get testy with each other because they are in a confined space together. Spread out across your house as much as possible. Each person in your family should have some time where they can head outside and be with others.
5. Negotiate
When in doubt, split the difference between two people. If there is a conflict over who does the dishes, divide the chore evenly.
6. Protect Yourself From Unfair Criticism
You may get criticism that you regard as unwarranted or impolite. Recognize that you don’t feel like the criticism is accurate. If a conversation is growing heated, tell the person you are talking to that you need to leave in order to calm down.
7. Find Catharsis for Intense Feelings
Never take out your anger on someone else. Under no circumstances should you use physical force.
Punch or scream into a pillow, or squeeze a stress doll. Write down what you are feeling and thinking and then tear the paper into pieces.
8. Attend Family Counseling
Find a complete list of family counselling services and keep the contact information of at least one service on hand. If arguments are escalating, take your whole family to a counselor.
How to End Family Fights
You shouldn’t forget your family fights. When someone disputes something with you, think about how you will respond. Say something that indicates that you are listening to them.
Be precise with your feelings, and feel free to separate a little bit after a conflict. If you need a quick solution, forge a negotiation.
Defend yourself if you receive an unfair comment. But don’t be too aggressive with someone else. If nothing is working, go to family counseling.
Ending fights is one way you can help your family. Find out more by following our coverage.
